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Allow me to confess that I find you quite tangible for a phantasmagorical being.
I must say, this is really quite strange. You are the first living being I have ever met in this place. Nevertheless, I will introduce myself. I am the Judge.

The Batter has a sacred mission to fulfill.
He seeks to purify the world. You, then, the controller, the soul that he harbors, must aid him in this laudable task. Alongside my sportive companion you will find it necessary to solve puzzles, rain blows upon certain hostile individuals of our wild zones, and oversee the headways and logistics of a network of swan boats and interurban locomotives.

I, too, travel widely among the zones of this world.
Open your wings and fly toward the zones ahead without hesitation! All of them are filled with strange and enchanting beings as well as every modern convenience. All of them appear, it must be said, to require the beneficient application of our friend the Batter’s muscular wrist. Do not worry, my dear phantasm—I, the Judge, will be with you (in spirit and body) at all the most crucial moments of your quest.

I'm going to cut that insufferable smile right out of your face

How dare you talk to me? Why have you decided to be such a pain in my ass? The Queen chose me to protect Zone 1, and I've dedicated my whole life to it. 
Listen. Get out of here, and take those ghosts with you, or I am going to kill you. I hope that's clear enough.